Fair warning. This isn't exactly about TLS, not directly, BUT it is about the journey and it is about teaching.
Today was a bad day. The kids are doing Romeo and Juliet. They are loving it. We discuss and preview the scene. Then we read it in class. We will watch two movie versions of the play during which we will note which lines of the play are used and to what effect. We will discuss original intent and changes in tone, theme and message and we will discuss who made those choices, actors, director, editor, etc. The kids are fighting over who gets what part each day and they have all decided that Romeo is a pathetic excuse for a human being and Juliet is an idiot for falling for him.
Yet today was a bad day. It had NOTHING to do with TLS. The details are unimportant. Stupid, petty, sophomoric behavior ruined my day. It happened, I dealt with it as best I thought I could and then I spent the rest of my day second guessing myself. I'm like that. I even called my dad and cried a little. He reminded me that I am putting everything into this, stress and emotions are high.... Today would have bothered me regardless, but, he's right, I feel everything more right now. In a lot of ways its like my first year teaching, except I don't have the unknown as comfort. After twelve years and four schools I know what can go wrong, I know the worst case scenarios. I know that sometimes a bad day can be more than a bad day by the time it's over.
I graded papers, answered emails, wrote plans, watched/directed a play rehearsal and drove home. Then I gave into my own self destructive tendencies and (gasp!) ordered pizza.
The 21 year old who delivered my pizza was a former student. He was a great student. I had his brother, also a great kid, too. I also attended his Eagle Scout ceremony and worked with both boys through the Boy Scouts. We chatted for a minute about his plans for his future. He's getting his degree in journalism. He said, "If I write something someday, Miss Williams, will you read it?" I answered, "When you write something someday I will be pleased and proud to read it." He smiled and went to do his next delivery. He'll never know that emotionally speaking, he saved my life tonight...
Sometimes the stress gets to us, sometimes that stress isn't even important stuff, or about important stuff, but it gets to us and we question everything, and we want to quit. Then God sends a messenger, an angel in disguise, a gift, to remind us, why we are here. For a minute I lost sight of what I was doing. I needed to be reminded. Not only was the message perfect, it was at the perfect time which just goes to show I am on the right track, I am in the right place and the rest of it doesn't matter.
Like I said, technically this post is not about TLS. I posted this because I wanted to record the moment, to remember this for the next time and I thank anyone who is reading for their support, patience and willingness to read what has technically nothing to do with the program this blog is about... But this is what TLS is about. Reaching students. Making them readers. Making them Critical Thinkers. Making them Writers. Making them everything they can be. That is what being a teacher is about, too. For a second I forgot. But now, I remember.
And I am so very, very thankful. Tomorrow is going to be a great day. One of many.
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